For countless Nazis this was the last thing they would ever see.
Why He’s Hot:
- That’s Sgt. Donny Donowitz. But you might know him better by his nickname: The Bear Jew. That alone should get your loins tingling.
- Fuck a duck! Look at those muscles. All of his Nazi killing has clearly kept him in top physical condition.
- His eyes. Those big, dark balls of hotness let you know that he has killed before, but also that there may be a tender side deep within him. I for one would be willing to explore that further given the chance.
- He looks ridiculously good in a suit. Check him out. He is also the only person in the known universe who can wear pants this high and come out of it looking hot as all hell.
- He doesn’t just beat German soldiers with a club. Bashes their brains in with a baseball bat is what he does. I’d be willing to step up to the plate anytime he wanted to swing his ”bat” in my direction, that’s for sure.
{submission}
Why He’s Hot:
- The man is the fucking Bear Jew. Tell me you didn’t jizz your pants when you saw him fucking unload on that Nazi with his baseball bat? Yeah, that’s right, we thought so. He put on forty pounds of muscle to play Donny Donowitz, and I don’t see anyone complaining, do you?
- He can protect you. I mean really now, girls (and boys, everyone is attracted to him, it’s just the way it is), look at how massive he is. He’s 6 feet of muscular deliciousness, even before he packed on the muscle for the role. But besides the fact that he’s strong, he creates torture-horror films for a living. You know he could think of creative ways to defend you.
- He’s friends to the animals, and while PETA is annoying and extreme, Eli’s PETA Ad had us all laughing, and wondering why the hell he didn’t do the “I’d rather go naked than wear fur” campaign.
- He’s Jewish, and for the record, if you look at all of the sexy-as-fuck celebrities that are Jewish, or at least part Jewish, you’ll notice that there are a fucking lot of them. Admit it, he makes you want to convert, marry him, and have beautiful Jewish babies.
- The man looks good in basically anything. He can wear the shit out of a suit, he can wear graphic tees and jeans, or regular, casual sweaters, and look sexy as fuck. Basically he can wear just about anything, including blood. You’d expect the creator of moves like Hostel to look like Marilyn Manson? No, he’s a GQMF if there ever was one.
